Who gets your kids if you die?


I have been thinking lately that I should name a legal guardian for my children just in case both me and my husband die.

My husband and I will be the guardians of my brothers(two brothers/one son each) sons in case something should happen to them & their partners.We have been asked by friends of our to be their children's legal guardian if something should happen to them as well.

It's pretty heavy stuff.

I know we should name a guardian for our children and that we should definitely put it in writing so there are no questions as to who gets them, but thinking about dying and our children living without us is too depressing. In fact, I worry about it more than I should. I don't think anyone is capable of loving my children as much as I do.

We've talked about it a bit, but we've found it hard to come up with a choice we both feel comfortable with. He wants to name his parents, but I don't get along well with them AND they are old, very old. If they pass on, my children would go to my husbands brother and his wife. Who I definitely DO NOT get along with. My own brothers can not be trusted with dogs let alone my children.

We actually asked some good friends of ours after baby girl was born and they agreed, but we have yet to put it in writing. And we barely/rarely see this couple any longer. I don't know if this agreement is still active? I would love to ask my dear friend in Australia because she and I have almost the exact same parenting style. But asking her and her husband to take on three children would be a lot.

I feel that as soon as we put it in writing we are sealing our fate. Isn't that bizarre? I shouldn't think that way, but it still just seeps into my brain.

Have you named a legal guardian for your baby in the event of your death? How did you make the decision? What kinds of things did you consider?